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First dates can be intimidating. You’re not sure whether your outfit is cool enough, or if the other person actually resembles his/her dating profile. At least you can count on some golden rules when ordering dinner. Next time, it’s probably better for your love life to skip on these 8 foods listed below. Unless you willingly volunteer yourself for a disaster!

We love a hearty plate of Lanzhou lamian, but have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror after chowing it down? Chili oil and sauce splatters everywhere! If you want to show your fascination with local eats, opt for anything else but noodles.

Soft shell. Hard shell. Soft shell wrapped in hard shell. Whatever works best for you, be cautious when ordering tacos on your date as there will be no multitasking. It’s almost impossible to keep your focus on the person sitting across you while keeping the tacos intact.

There are couple of really dank wings deals at bars around the city, but you wouldn’t want to see your date, hands deep, in ranch. Save it for later when you’ve both got accustomed to each others nasty habits.

Chinese people seem to have superpowers when it comes to eating shellfish neatly. Have you seen how your Shanghai friends eat stuff like prawns? Mad skills. But you, my fellow laowai, forget about it.

Indian food can be somewhat tricky on a first date. The cuisine is absolutely divine, but it involves a lot of spices, beans and lentils. Probably a lot more than your tummy could handle. Chat over curry and naan when you’ve already gotten past the awkward phase.

Hot dogs pose an interesting dilemma. Do you bite it just a little? Squish the damn thing in your mouth? Lick the condiments first to stop the dripping? Things might get too graphic, you’ve been warned!

When sushi is poorly made, it can result in sloppy rolls with all the fillings falling out. Another dreaded scenario – oversized maki rolls that hardly fit in your mouth. Oops!

Liquid dinner. Need we say more?

We’ve made it through swelteringly-hot week, so what better way to celebrate than with a right royal knees-up? Saturday 19th May sees Prince Harry and Meghan Markle tie the knot at England’s Windsor Castle – our invites may have gotten lost in the post, but there’s plenty going on over here to mark(le) this momentous occasion. Whether you plan to watch it at the pub, hang up the bunting and stream it at home, or attend a glamourous gala ball, we’ve whipped up a short guide to the event and what food and drink to best accompany you through the proceedings.

4.30pm: Guests arrive

Expect a truly British affair, with copious amounts of queuing, polite “hello’s” and courteous “how do you do’s”. This part of the day will be all about sharing and mingling, so have plenty of prosecco on hand, fancy canapés, and the staple of any posh party – cucumber sandwiches. P.S. don’t forget the tea.

6.20pm: The Royal Family arrive

Members of the monarchy make their way into Windsor Castle. Prince Harry and big bro Duke of the Cambridge will join the crew at 6.45pm, with Her Royal Majesty the last of the family to arrive. Time to get patriotic, raise a beer or gin and tonic, and get some pre-World Cup practice in with an emphatic rendition of God Save the Queen.

6.59pm: Meghan Markle arrives

It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for – finding out what dress the bride-to-be will be wearing. Word on the street is it’s a number by British couture company Ralph & Russo, but whatever the case we’re sure it will have all green with envy – queue the salads. Or, if you’re in need of something a bit heartier to soak up the earlier toasts, burgers and grilled cheese sandwiches are a fitting nod to Ms. Markle’s American roots.

7pm: The service begins

The Royal Family are all present and seated, family crests and Great British flags drape the walls, and the choir boys’ rendition of Jerusalem fills St George’s Chapel. With so much pomp and circumstance in one room, only staples of British cuisine will do. Whilst the Brits might not exactly be renowned for their food, you can’t go far wrong with a traditional fish ’n’ chips, or pie and mash.

Order yours from THE ISLES

8.05pm: Carriage procession

Looks of wonderment at the service turn to despair as young girls realise another Prince Charming – and with him the chance to be a princess – has slipped away. Ice cream tubs at the ready. A fine vintage wine or whiskey will be the perfect tipple to accompany the newlyweds’ 25-minute cruise in an 1883-built Ascot Landau carriage.

Cake.

This is where the schedule gets a bit blurry and TV coverage gets a little restricted – the Queen will be hosting a lunch reception in St. George’s Hall, whilst the happy couple wave to the British public, so we’ll ditch the timings here and fast forward to the good bit. No wedding is complete without cake, and according to Kensington Palace, they’ll be enjoying an “organic lemon and elderflower wedding cake incorporating the bright flavours of spring.” We’ll have what they’re having.

If you’ve made it this far and still somehow have room for more, the rest is up to you! Have a splendid weekend.

With great power, comes great responsibility – so if you’re in charge of organising your squad’s weekend, make sure you do it right! Read on for some inspiration on how to conquer boredom this weekend.

Spoilers have boarded their alien vessels (Facebook and Instagram) and traversed the cosmos (firewall), to ruin the ending of the latest Marvel instalment, ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ for us folk in the Middle Kingdom. If you’ve managed to shield yourself from these unwelcome invaders until now, then you’ll be glad to know the wait is over, and all of your favourite, least favourite, and potentially never-even-heard-of Marvel heroes will be assembling on Chinese screens from Friday.

If sitting in a dark room watching a big purple dude chase after some ‘forever pebbles’ (or whatever they’re called) isn’t your idea of fun, have no fear – all-day brunches, beer fests and rooftop bars are here in numbers to save the day.

For those still standing after an action-packed weekend, Sunday night brings us the final fixtures of the English Premier League season – a last chance to bid farewell to a true legend of the beautiful game, and see our footballing heroes (or villains, depending how your team’s campaign has gone) slog it out for a final three points.

Last but far from least, it’s time to honour the real heroes: Mums. Sunday 13th May is Mother’s Day, so best get those cards written, flowers in order, and chocolates in the fridge, or risk making mum angry – you wouldn’t like her when she’s angry.

Have a great weekend!

Wait, what? You’re one of those lucky ones in the city with a kitchen bigger than an extra-spacious coffin?

We envy you.

We’d like to cook, but shudder at the mere idea of trying to whip up a feast in our square meter of fun.

We’ll stick to the delivery and live vicariously through you by sharing these kid friendly cooking ideas instead.

Hot Dog Cheesy

The humble hot dog meets the classic grilled cheese sandwich. It’s comfort food for kids at its best, and it requires no prep time at all!

Animal Pancakes

Cutest things ever. Take your kids’ favourite animals and have some fun.

Pizza Quesadilla

I have a pizza. I have a quesadilla. Uh! Pizza-Quesadilla! Enjoy the ultimate finger food combo.

Rainbow Waffles

Even if there’s no pot of gold at the end, you can at least eat the entire delicious rainbow.

Kids’ Bento Boxes

They’ll be the coolest kids at school with a customized lunch bento box. Just make sure to craft a superhero one for the boys.

Pokemon Curry

If you don’t want to make it yourself, this is a real dish that you can really buy at a restaurant in Hong Kong. Awesome.

S’mores Stuffed Waffles

No campfires allowed in the apartment, but you can still recreate the taste of your youth with these s’mores waffles!

Fruit/Vegetable Platter Faces

Trick ’em into eating healthy with these creative platters.

Ghost Pizza Bagels

Get your kids screaming for more with this fun and easy take on a pizza bagel.

Banana Sushi

Not everyone is born with a love for raw fish, but you can slowly build up their desire to try with this fun banana sushi roll! It’s great for breakfast or as snack any time in the day.

Any of these fun ideas catch your eye?

Go ahead and show your kids that cooking can be fun!