Made the tough decision to stick out Spring Festival in China? Who needs to massively overpay on airfare just to read a book on a gorgeous tropical beach anyways?

Just look at how awful this is.

Whether you’re fresh off the plane or an old China hand, there are a few ways you can make sure your staycation is a success.

FULLY STOCKED FRIDGE

Uh-oh, the friendly Fujian shushu and ayi have closed up their dumpling shop for the holiday season. Let’s go check the nearby Lanzhou noodle place. What?!? They’re closed too…

Yup, all those hard-working folks who keep you fed on a daily basis have all gone back to their hometowns for a well-deserved rest with their families. You’d better clear out some of those beer bottles and stock up your fridge, or at least grab a carton of instant noodles from the nearest convenience store.

We’ll still be delivering but many of our couriers will be out of town and many of our partner restaurants will also be enjoying a vacation. Make sure to have a back up choice (or three) in mind.

NOISE-CANCELLING HEADPHONES

While the bigger cities like Shanghai and Beijing have made zealous efforts to shut down the fireworks shows in the inner rings, you still might run into a stray blast or two. If you’re in a smaller town though, make sure to have some hefty noise cancellers unless you like a 5:00 am wake-up call of explosions that will proceed to last all day. We warned you.

STACKS OF CASH

Sorry, we know we just used this gif, but we had to use it again. We love it.

Going to meet your partner’s family this year? Make sure you bring plenty of pink maos and red envelopes to make it through the season. It’s like a battlefield. One for mom, one for dad, one for the siblings, one each for each one of the kids, one for the aunt, one for the uncle, one for all of their kids….the list goes on and on.

SPARE LIVER & GAS MASK

While we’re talking about your partner’s hometown, we definitely can’t fail to mention the non-stop barrage of 60% abv baijiu and tar-laden cigarettes that are coming your way. Everyone will want to chug down multiple shots while inhaling fumes, seemingly at the same time, with you.

Pro.

Don’t worry if you indulge too much though, there’s always the IV drip from the nearby hospital to get you feeling right as rain again the next day!

SUPERPOWERS

Oh, so you decided to take the wonderful time off and visit one of those awesome Chinese tourist spots you’ve been meaning to go to? Great idea, so great in fact that 1 billion other people had the exact same idea. It’s gonna take some serious powers to make it out alive.

Pictured: every tourist place in China.

Hopefully these little tips will have you emerging from the Spring Festival madness unscathed. Do you have any tips to share? Let us know in the comments below!